WORDS TO LIVE BY

I’m embarrassed to admit how many times I’ve watched the Netflix series Quarterback. So much inspiration and so many pearls of wisdom. Thankfully, this guilty pleasure got me to today…the first preseason NFL game.

In one of the episodes, Kirk Cousins recalls a conversation whereby someone told him, “It’s good to be uncomfortable.” That statement has stayed with me for weeks. And so, I spent a little time thinking about being uncomfortable this year.

I was uncomfortable accepting my friend, Robin’s, invitation to co-host The Problem With Perfect podcast. I am definitely a work in progress.

I finally got Covid which was positively uncomfortable. I had convinced myself I was some kind of medical miracle when years had gone by without contracting the dreaded plague. No such luck!

It was uncomfortable being at a funeral I never imagined I would attend. That said, it was nice to see old friends and to be there to support my kids and gbabes.

I watched the CrossFit Games last weekend and was incredibly uncomfortable watching the Adaptive athletes compete. It was not their disabilities that made me uncomfortable, rather, the fact that I have absolutely no excuse for not exercising on the daily. Those athletes are incredible.

I am fundraising and learning Hindi for an upcoming mission trip to India. Everything about that sentence is uncomfortable, yet I cannot wait.

I’m sure there are some uncomfortable moments yet to come but my track record, thus far, is encouraging. I hope you will take a few minutes to consider where, how, or why you’ve been uncomfortable this year, and how you succeeded despite that discomfort.

“Always remember that you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, smarter than you think and loved more than you know.” Winnie the Pooh

Last Friday, I called the gbabes to see if they wanted to go to the movies to see Oppenheimer. What teenage boys wouldn’t want to see a movie about war and bombs and stuff? Much to my surprise, the 16-year-old replied, “I’d rather see Barbie.” His 14-year-old brother agreed, so off we went.

I’ll admit I was a bit confused about their choice. The oldest gbabe is a gamer and the youngest plays heavy metal on guitar. When they were little, they liked Thomas the Train, Legos, and monster trucks. Neither owned a Barbie nor expressed a desire to have one. Thus, their interest in seeing the movie intrigued me.

As we were driving to the show, I asked, “Why Barbie?” Imagine my surprise shock when they explained, “Mimi, this isn’t about the doll, it’s about patriarchy, women’s rights, equality, and discrimination.” Silly me.

After the movie, the conversation on the drive home was equally telling. They noticed that in Barbie land, the President of the US, all members of the Supreme Court, and every occupation was occupied by females, and they wondered aloud how long it would be before that became a reality. (Been wondering that myself!) They also found it interesting that, “the guys in the movie were kinda dumb” until they went to the real world and “took over all the jobs the women had in Barbie land even though they weren’t as qualified or as smart.” Outta the mouths of gbabes!

I could not be more impressed with these gents. You can say what you want about our schools failing the next generation, but the 16-year-old explained he had studied Oppenheimer “all last year in history class.” Although world history is a valuable part of education, I was more encouraged by the fact they both knew about patriarchy, discrimination, and inequality. Those are the people I want helping women run the world in years to come.

I’m thinking I should buy each of them a Barbie so they don’t forget.

My mom is a member of a church in a rural town in the Midwest. During a recent conversation, she shared news about a project her church initiated. She was proud to explain the church had established a residence for homeless individuals needing shelter and support. The initiative will also provide occupational and life skills training. How cool is that?!

What an amazing gift for those less fortunate. The pandemic, addiction, and mental health issues have drastically impacted the lives of so many individuals and their families. The fact that the members of this church took it upon themselves to make a difference is inspiring.

I’m not one to quote the Bible, because, quite frankly, I know very little about what’s in the Bible. When I went to parochial school, we were discouraged from reading the Bible for fear we would misinterpret it. Those crazy Catholics!! However, there is a passage I am familiar with, Matthew 25:35-37.

Individually, it’s hard to know how and who to help. Collectively, the sky’s the limit. If you belong to a faith community, consider implementing a similar initiative. If you can, volunteer at a homeless shelter or food bank. Donate clothes to charitable organizations. Participate in a food drive. Everyone can do something.

Somewhere in the Bible I think it says, “Well done, good and faithful servant” but don’t quote me on that.

Why is it so hard to ask for help? Do we really think we can have it all, do it all, and be all that without a little help? Come on now!

I don’t think we were meant to be a one-man band. It takes 50-80 musical instruments to create a symphony. There are 55 members of each NFL team (not to mention coaches, trainers, etc.). A baseball game consists of 9 players on each team (and a great grounds crew). And although, we saw an historic performance by Nikola Jokiƈ this year, he was quick to point out “it took whole team” to make the NBA Championship a reality.

If you truly think you did it all by yourself, think again. I’ve never met a “self-made” individual. I’ve met several who thought they were, but no one does it alone. Family, friends, coaches, antagonists, nay-sayers, teachers – there is always someone that helped make it happen – whatever it was. Whether you are a celebrity, sports star, or average Joe/Josie, someone helped get you where you are today.

We never know the difference we make in the lives of others. One word of encouragement, one extra minute to demonstrate a skill or hold the door, one moment of patience and understanding – our ability to help another human is ubiquitous. And, usually, it doesn’t cost a dime.

If you need help, just ask. If you have help to give, just do it. We are all just walking each other home!

Last week’s blog had a typo in it. My initial reaction was one of humiliation and shame. I couldn’t believe I didn’t notice it after proofing it a gazillion times. Catholic guilt and my reputation as Sister Mary Punctuation may have contributed to my embarrassment.

Throughout this past week, I also noticed a typo in someone else’s blog, a typo in a book I was reading, and a typo in an article on the Internet. Rather than being comforted by these frequent occurrences, I wondered how those authors felt when they realized a typo had been immortalized for all to see.

When I wrote my dissertation, oh so many years ago, it was proofed by multiple people and a jury of my peers. My dissertation Chair read it, the members of my dissertation committee read it, and my trusted friend who was going through the program with me probably could have recited it. We were determined no typos would be found. Years later, I was reviewing the document as I looked for a quote I had included, and lo and behold, I found a typo.

After way too much time, angst, and deliberation, I have landed on “So what?” So, the blog had a typo. So, my dissertation wasn’t perfect. No one revoked my degree. No one mentioned the typo in the blog, and quite frankly, I’m pretty sure no one, but me, cares.

This is progress, people!

I recently spent a week with my grandson. We traveled to Oregon to visit his friend and to tour a few colleges. To be exact, he spent a LOT of time visiting his friend and I researched schools, no tours were taken. While we were gone, he celebrated turning 16 and I did not celebrate turning 71.

It’s been a minute since I spent that much time up close and personal with a teenager. These are my humble observations:

It was a wonderful trip. Oregon is beautiful. Traveling for a hundred miles along the Columbia River was simply breathtaking. I’m so glad we got to experience those sights together…kinda. I would point out the wonders, he would look up from his phone, acknowledge the beauty with a slight head nod, then return to his phone…for four solid hours coming and going. (Had I been in the passenger seat, I would have gotten a good 3 hours sleep each way.) Suffice it to say, neither of us are cut out for over-the-road-trucking.

Between him wearing Airpods continuously, and me not wearing my Airpods (aka hearing aids), we are both, evidently, deaf.

Our favorite travel game of yore was the license plate game. On our trip, I pointed out every new plate I saw, but he couldn’t hear me so no one made the list. (If anyone cares, I saw Florida, Oklahoma, Washington, Oregon, and Colorado.)

I waaaay underestimated the food budget.

Teenagers and “old people” do not share similar sleep cycles.

Despite our generational differences, it was the trip of a lifetime with one of my favorite people. I can’t wait to go again, but first I have to catch up on my sleep and lose the #^%#^ pounds I gained trying to keeping up with his appetite (no contest there)!

I have a friend who lives by the mantra: Best Day Ever. Regardless of the day, week, month, or moment, she declares every day the Best Day Ever. What a wonderful way to go through life! I wish I was more like her. It’s not that I fail to recognize my blessings, or appreciate the world around me, however, I don’t always remember to give each moment its just due. I’m going to work on that.

There are definitely moments that bring me joy beyond measure:

Spending time with my children and gbabes are moments I treasure.
I love watching the sun rise and set.
I am in awe of majestic trees.
Reading.
Watching football.
Exercising.
The sound of the ocean is music to my soul.
And speaking of music, listening to a show at Red Rocks is an experience I love to share with family and friends.

What I’ve realized is the event may be ordinary but appreciating the present moment makes it extraordinary.

Best Day Ever!

I’m not one to complain, okay, that’s not entirely true, but a recent round of customer disservice has me perplexed. (I wanted to say p*ssed but that’s not nice.) For the life of me, and it was kinda that serious, I cannot understand how people who are in customer service can be totally inept and disinterested, and still keep their job. I mean, really, I would fire myself if I was that incompetent.

Case in point. I recently contacted my prescription benefits company and ordered a 90-day supply of my heart medication. As advertised, using their online service is intended to “save money and be more convenient.” The “convenient” online option enabled me to order the heart medication, push Send, and wait 5-7 days for the meds to arrive on my doorstep. Eleven days later, I checked the “convenient” website and learned the order was not processed because my “credit card was inactive.” Mind you, at that point, I had the website pulled up, and my credit card number was, in fact, noted correctly, and active. Unfortunately for me, they were using a credit card number that was not mine. To add insult to injury, I did not receive a call, text, or email to explain the delay, despite the fact they send copious weekly emails advertising the exceptional benefits of their “convenient” program. I call b.s.

Needless to say, an actual conversation with a human was now in order. After 3 calls and a total of 47 minutes on the phone, the error was resolved. However, I was advised it would be another 5-7 days before the meds would arrive. By this time, I needed high blood pressure medication, too! My request to have the heart medication sent overnight was politely declined. It took me asking them what other resolution could be provided. The customer rep replied, “Well, I guess we could ask your doctor to send an emergency prescription to a local pharmacy.” Lord help me.

Thankfully, that transaction occurred. However, I then received a call from the local pharmacy advising they were out of that particular heart medication. I asked the young lad on the other end of the line if he had checked with other pharmacies (since there’s one on every corner). “No, but I can if you want me to.” Who knew Einstein worked at Walgreens?!

I finally took matters into my own hands and called a different local pharmacy that rhymes with CVS to determine if they had the prescribed heart medication. When availability was confirmed, I asked if they would call their neighbors across the street, have the prescription transferred to them, and advise me when the order was ready for pickup. Much to their credit, their customer service was impeccable and extremely efficient.

I’ll admit I’m pretty good at advocating for myself. I worry for the poor soul who doesn’t have a computer, or can’t hear well enough to ‘follow the prompts,’ or doesn’t have the mental capacity to navigate the system. Good luck and Godspeed!

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ🖤ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

A few weeks ago, I spent time with some elite athletes. Professional athletes who work out for hours at a time, several times a day. At the end of those days, they walk 10,000 steps for fun. On their “rest day,” they play volleyball for 7 hours on the beach. Athletes who have phenomenal physiques chiseled to near perfection. The type of individuals who get paid to perform feats of strength and endurance.

Other than the fact we are all human, I have absolutely nothing in common with these people. I won’t even begin to compare my fitness to theirs. Nor has anyone ever paid me to compete or win the CrossFit Games. In fact, I’ve actually paid my hard-earned money to run a 10K. How crazy is that?! Try as I might, I thought there was just no way I could relate to them…until…

One afternoon, I overheard a conversation that brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart. A few of these elite, professional, phenomenal athletes were discussing creating a “treat day.” Yes, you heard it here. They were planning which day of the week they would each bring brownies, cookies, or other delicacies to the gym for “treat day.” And just like that, we were kindred spirits.

Sam, Jenn, Dani, Chandler, and Jessi, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You have renewed my faith in humanity and set a wonderful example for all of us weekend warriors and “Girls Who Eat.” This weekend as you compete, I will be cheering you on…from my couch…while eating treats…just like you!

I love to learn. After finishing 23 years of college learning, I began teaching so I could continue to learn without having to pay tuition, write papers, or take finals. I learned a lot while I was teaching. I learned how rewarding teaching can be. I learned the compensation does not begin to equal the time and effort. I learned I will never, ever teach the Power, Privilege & Oppression course again. I learned grading is hard. I also learned even graduate students have dogs that eat their homework. It was a good run but I’ve decided 6 years was long enough.

I’m excited about new learning opportunities. I’ve created a list to keep me motivated:

Understand the workings of the Social Security program – that may be an oxymoron

Explore the risks and benefits of AI

Continue ASL classes – Saw my teacher at the airport and signed “Hello” and “I’m going to Colorado” – it was a moment 😊

Read more biographies

Determine which streaming service has the best NFL coverage

Figure out how to wash the outside of my windows from the inside of the house – it was a major selling point when I replaced all the windows but it’s been a minute

Gain a better understanding of the use of psychedelics as a therapeutic tool

And last but not least, finally pass Algebra 101.

I can’t wait to get started!