The “C” Word

Cancer – possibly the most dreaded word in the English language.

The word cancer is loathed and feared – a word that strikes terror in the hearts of those diagnosed, and in those who walk the journey alongside their loved one. For the past 20 years, I have worked with people who were diagnosed with cancer. Notice I did not say “cancer patients.” The person always comes first, the illness second.

I’ve had the privilege of meeting amazing people who demonstrated courage, tenacity, and grace in the face of terror and pain. It has been an interesting study in human nature to observe the many ways people cope with their cancer diagnosis:

• I have known patients who equated their cancer experience to a fender bender…Had it, fixed it, moved on.
• I’ve known women bejeweled in pink, and women who were militantly opposed to pink ribbons.
• I know a woman who brought in a pair of granny panties with words of encouragement written all over them by family and friends because, “It’s time to put on my big girl panties and kick cancer’s ass.”
• I know a woman who deemed herself the Colorectal Queen.
• I’ve known men who were just as devastated as women when their hair fell out.
• One of my all-time favorites is a quote by a friend who had a terminal diagnosis, “Well, I guess I don’t have to be so anal about flossing anymore.”
  
  I’ve held space for patients who railed at the gods, those who begged for a miracle, and some who considered their diagnosis an opportunity to make amends. I know a young man who wants his cancer experience to bring others closer to God. Some use humor to cope; some deem cancer a vicious enemy to be defeated – there is no right or wrong way.
  
  Over the years, I’ve been changed by the pearls of wisdom patients have bestowed. Almost every time I speak with a patient, I hear the same two sentiments:

Make the most of every day.
When you care about people, tell them you love them.
Words to live by.